a drug holocaust
a drug holocaust coming back to Mexico in the borderline, rumor was, that Mexican and American authorities together stopped a young man carrying some kilos strapped to his chest and stomach, right there on the dividing line, blocking young pedestrians the entrance back to their respective country. [being youthful was being guilty].
As i tried to walk the broken corners of the bridge back to my country, noticed all the corners filled with hooligans and gangsters all the way to the top. before i stepped in-someone in the crowd stopped me to tell me: If you walk in there, you're most likely to get beat up or gang raped. The rage of being detained for no reason, had made them turn against each other. All the San Ysidro area was swarmed with teenage heads sitting and waiting creating sporadic outbrakes of desperation and impatiance.
I decided to take my chances and try to make a run for it on the broken corners of the bridge, the first night sleeping on asphalt like everybody else, didn't feel as if i was to be punished for somebody else's mistake. The trolley stopped making the route considering their last station a dangerous hazard. The military came in with electro-shock weapons to put order among civilians, my voice could not be heard even if i shouted. The last fast food restaurant next to the border was broken into-looted, made workers stay under threat to keep making food for everyone all night long. chaos all over.
The next morning had well in mind that i was not going to stay there for long, i knew i could talk my way out of it with one of the guards. I convinced him i could make it across with his help, then he told me all about the small hole in the ground and the advantages it could bring me. after a cautios walk amongst vicious broken corner standers, the guard led me the way, after all those eyes delicately followed our moves quesioning themselves -why? why would a guard help *one* out of the crowd? even though we were out numbered they all remained standing next to the wall on the side and corners.
When we finally got to the top the guard showed me the hole in the ground made out of solid concrete, he told me to get in there, if I made it out in one piece, then i could walk across the border: back home to my country.
The size of it was ridiculously small, I had to first put my arm through it, my head was jammed together with my armpit. Once my eyes were in, I found a long cylinder with a set of striped spirals, like structured DNA, which was my job to slip myself through without getting locked in; my way down was hard but not impossible, the stripes at the end of the spiral became smaller and smaller until it made me reach the floor and look up to a small light above, my whole body dropped and turned directions to climb my way back to the top. I had to take the other way from where i came in (the other side of the spiral) only to find that this side on my way up could easily lock me in if i took the wrong step, that could mean being jammed there to forgiveness, the voice of the guard was long gone. for a moment one of the steps caught my lower abdomen, on lock, and somehow managed to escape and push my self up to finish what i started. The light kept coming closer providing me with some fresh air, I could almost feel the outside, I could almost feel conquering the challenge, the last set of stripes made the circle as wide as an open exit.
The guard was not there as I stepped out to the cold asphalt, instead all the rest that waited to go across, hoping for the madness to end- stood in silence, they all recognized that a little effort and tenacity could potentially pull them out of there as well.
Walking out of there with my head down, happy to prevail, sad and angry to look back at their faces screaming for their ticket to come up ... the sirens went off. Paulo.
As i tried to walk the broken corners of the bridge back to my country, noticed all the corners filled with hooligans and gangsters all the way to the top. before i stepped in-someone in the crowd stopped me to tell me: If you walk in there, you're most likely to get beat up or gang raped. The rage of being detained for no reason, had made them turn against each other. All the San Ysidro area was swarmed with teenage heads sitting and waiting creating sporadic outbrakes of desperation and impatiance.
I decided to take my chances and try to make a run for it on the broken corners of the bridge, the first night sleeping on asphalt like everybody else, didn't feel as if i was to be punished for somebody else's mistake. The trolley stopped making the route considering their last station a dangerous hazard. The military came in with electro-shock weapons to put order among civilians, my voice could not be heard even if i shouted. The last fast food restaurant next to the border was broken into-looted, made workers stay under threat to keep making food for everyone all night long. chaos all over.
The next morning had well in mind that i was not going to stay there for long, i knew i could talk my way out of it with one of the guards. I convinced him i could make it across with his help, then he told me all about the small hole in the ground and the advantages it could bring me. after a cautios walk amongst vicious broken corner standers, the guard led me the way, after all those eyes delicately followed our moves quesioning themselves -why? why would a guard help *one* out of the crowd? even though we were out numbered they all remained standing next to the wall on the side and corners.
When we finally got to the top the guard showed me the hole in the ground made out of solid concrete, he told me to get in there, if I made it out in one piece, then i could walk across the border: back home to my country.
The size of it was ridiculously small, I had to first put my arm through it, my head was jammed together with my armpit. Once my eyes were in, I found a long cylinder with a set of striped spirals, like structured DNA, which was my job to slip myself through without getting locked in; my way down was hard but not impossible, the stripes at the end of the spiral became smaller and smaller until it made me reach the floor and look up to a small light above, my whole body dropped and turned directions to climb my way back to the top. I had to take the other way from where i came in (the other side of the spiral) only to find that this side on my way up could easily lock me in if i took the wrong step, that could mean being jammed there to forgiveness, the voice of the guard was long gone. for a moment one of the steps caught my lower abdomen, on lock, and somehow managed to escape and push my self up to finish what i started. The light kept coming closer providing me with some fresh air, I could almost feel the outside, I could almost feel conquering the challenge, the last set of stripes made the circle as wide as an open exit.
The guard was not there as I stepped out to the cold asphalt, instead all the rest that waited to go across, hoping for the madness to end- stood in silence, they all recognized that a little effort and tenacity could potentially pull them out of there as well.
Walking out of there with my head down, happy to prevail, sad and angry to look back at their faces screaming for their ticket to come up ... the sirens went off. Paulo.
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